Submit

I'd procrastinated...December was insane...sick kids, John working a lot, prepping for Christmas, Christmas parties, dance recytles, etc...left me a lil' haggared. I shelfed the adoption and wouldn't even allow myself to think about it.

We have friends who were going to visit Ethiopia in January and I decided to tell my friend the name and age I thought this little boy would be when she visited, and ask her to look around for him. If she found him, great. If not, then we would wait a year to adopt. I could understand the wisdom in this...logically who would blame us? We would be so much more equipped to handle an adoption a year from now.

Then in a matter of 2 days...everything changed.

A friend of mine shared what the Hopkins family are doing http://howmanyis2many.blogspot.com/2013/01/our-newest-additions.html After reading this I was completely broken. "C'mon Lacey, seriously! These guys are adopting 4 and you're being such a wuss." But what really struck me about this family was that they didn't require a ton of signs or evidence to know that they wanted these kids in their family...they just saw a need and are meeting it.

The next day, we got together with Pastor Tim Wiedlich to talk.  Pastor Tim is AMAZING! Truly.  He is one of those people that the more you get to know him the more you like him even still.  He made us feel so cared for and validated. Toward the end of our conversation I said "Tim, I was sure hoping you'd just tell us what we are supposed to do"...He said "Well Lacey I have my opinions."  Me: "So what are they?"  Him:."I think you guys should adopt from Ethiopia. Just do it."

Now at this point, John and I had completed much of the fist step in the adoption process, we just needed to pay the fee to get the report written up (Home Study). So the next day...I couldn't get away from this.  Should we or shouldn't we adopt?  John had told me "Lacey, the next time you say we're going to adopt, then WE ARE GOING TO ADOPT.  You won't get to change your mind."  Oh that wise man of mine. 

I decided I'd type in all of my credit card info to pay for the homestudy.  Then I stepped away. I cleaned the house like a mad woman and was praying and asking God to please stop me if this was wrong. All I could think in my brain was

"You will never regret doing this. But if you don't, you will regret it your entire life".

So I finally went back to the computer and hit submit!!! 

And with it, a giant toppling wave of joy and peace washed over me, and I gave myself permission to get really really excited.